Saturday, February 9, 2008

Time flies and it all ticks away

Daddy surprised mommy tonight with her favorite ice cream from coldstone (coffee with heath bar). He knows just how to make me feel a little better, even after his long day at work. He's trying so hard; and everytime it gets tough, he says he's doing it all for his girls. He loves you so much already.

You'd laugh if you could sometimes. He's not used to taking care of babies, but he tries so hard for you. Just for example, the other night when we were putting you into a new gown (you pooped through because your diaper wasn't tight enough.. cough your dad cough), I asked him what size it was (remember you're tiny, I need the smallest possible), he replied 0-5 months. There is no such size in baby clothes, but it was probably around 3 am, we were both tired, and I didn't really have the energy to think this one through.. until morning. I looked at your gown and it said O/S... ONE SIZE haha. Granted at that time of the night, in basically the dark, and daddy being tired; we had a small laugh about it once I figured it out.

Tonight after you ate, you laid against my chest, your arms straight up as if you were hugging me; and I became sad for a moment realizing you're already 1 week 4 days old. It feels like yesterday already that you had just come out. I already want this whole 11 days of your life back, to experience this happiness all over again. It brings tears to my eyes to just know that everday for the rest of your life, I will want yesterday back because I enjoy you SO much.

Don't get me wrong, everyday I take full advantage of you being here, but it's not enough. I realize as you get older, everyday is going to bring something new, something you'll learn, something that will make my heart melt over and over again; and although your future holds so much I want to know and see, i'm trying to hold on to these moments of your new life, and this overwhelming love as much as I can.

My heart aches with so much love Lillian, and one day when you're a mother; I hope you feel this overwhelming joy.

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